Tempus fugit

Tempus fugit at a frightening pace, yet each moment seems endless when I don`t hear from you. How are you? Lots to do here, the material seems to rule our lives. Yes, man`s downfall, that very anchor that keeps us chained to the physical. At times I so wish I were a monk somewhere by the sea with nothing except prayers to my name. Yet we keep doing this to ourselves, forging the very link of our chain. No wonder man is doomed, for we keep doing it relentlessly. How right Jesus was. But our ego overides all, thus we fall.

I hope you did many pleasant things, and had some fun. Did you think of me? I did,  but when do I not? Well my sweet cuppy cake, that is the way it is here, and love is dancing by. May the angels fill you with Divine blessing today and always. May spirit break free of the fetters  that bind all of us  and may you soar above all earthly constraints, like an eagle. Be ever mindful of what is really important in life. This is my prayer for you as well as myself. Be happy and never forget love

Sending you my love that is deep as the ocean and kisses as many as there are grains of sand on the beaches of the universe.

Your Red Dragon

Suzanne

All--in pencil this morning. My all, my heart, but you are so very much more to me which I cannot

express. You bring me joy and inexplicable  happiness. Each moment I imagine you, 
writing each word to me-such beautiful words of love, thus I am enriched and my spirit sings. I treasure
each word, each moment as you heart beats within mine. Your soul resides within mine if that is at all 
possible. 

I cannot express my emotions enough, but I know that you know. I pray that I can in a small way be to 
you that which you are to me.

I thank God for your presence in my life and for loving me. I live in humble gratitude for I am aware that the present moment will simply be a memory soon.

May the Lord bless you with health, may his presence be ever beating within your heart. May love encompass each second of your life this is my wish only for you.

Every night you are a forever presence in my dreams and you also fill my daytime moments, you are forever with me. I feel you, I see you and I do not feel the distance space between us. Be that we are near, or far the heart is unaware of distance or time. Love is a gift seldom shared in a true way by many, I think we are one of the blessed few.

I wish I could be that Suzanne for you, the one who would takes you down to the river, the one you would love to lie with and spend the night with.  I wish I could be the one that you could travel with blindly,  for you know you can trust me for I have touched your perfect body with my mind.

Near or far I shall always be loving you,
Suzie 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owpkZzSRlYA

Speechless

 


Sweet love of my--a something breathtakingly beautiful written just for us by Rumi:

"Both light and shadow are the dance of love.

 Love has no cause, it is the astrolabe of God`s secret.

Lover and loving are inseparable and timeless. 

Although I may try and describe love, when I experience it, I am speechless.

Although I may try and write about love, I am rendered helpless.

My pen breaks, and the paper slips away at the ineffable place where lover , loving and loved are one.

Every moment is made glorious by the light of love"

--and how do I love thee sweet Oliver?  Words cannot say, for I am left speechless.

Suzie

Muse

It is the dawning of an other beautiful day. Your exquisite words resounding in my heart, burning right into the very fabric of my soul. You, the wizard of enchantment of words,  the spirit of writers and poets of old. Oh, are we not lucky? My world is filled with absolute bliss. You silently crept into my soul and transformed me into this glowing rainbow of illuminating colors. Each day that passes, the colors become brighter and brighter, the reason being it is an abundance of happiness.

Happiness is a grateful spirit, a heart full of love and knowing that you love me. But just remember one thing--I love you more. Have a blessed day filled with love, beauty and inspiration.

Your very own
little Muse-Suzie

Us

6 February/2013

Now I simply have to comment on this beautiful painting of Raphael, "The Sistine Madonna" his last alter piece--.  As you well realize I have her--she is a sepia antique etching circa l860 over my bed, in a beautiful  oak frame, she is life size --It is only only Our Lady and  baby Jesus not the entire scene. I have only realized now, after decades that the two well known cherubs are at her feet and are gazing at her in amazement. I have always known that they were Raphael`s cherubs, but did not know of their location (angels), the picture is in  Dresden, Germany. There, it resides as one of the central pieces in the "Old master`s Gallery" .No I am not so clever, I looked it up :-).


In 2007, when you sent the little "black rainbow angel" you sent a number of long hand written letters, as well as a number of cards, including one with these  two sweet things.

You said, " Well--here is to us aye? Here we are contemplating the mysteries of the universe and of the internet and  totally bare ass naked".

You also said, Betty Davies once said, ~ why ask for the moon when we already have the stars~  But love does that , and though we have a whole universe between us I often cannot but feel that nothing I could even give to you could in any way express the true depth of my gratitude for the imesurable treasures you give to me each day so utterly without stinting.

In truth, I don`t deserve you. And yet you put up with me, proclaiming that God is good after all, for if a an so unworthy as myself could be loved by one as you, then truly is the creation alive with blessed wonder."

No how on earth could I not love you--tell me?
 Suzie

Kindred spirits

Hey there my special angel. How are you?I hope the weekend is kind to you, and there will be  no more snow or storms. When I write these notes in the mornings I feel so very close to you. I feel connected and I am at peace with myself and us. I imagine you sleeping I am sure you can feel that, I may even wake you. The waking day is different for then you are busy, it is the nights and early mornings that are special. Then I am ever more present Does this make sense? I hope so, but for me you creep into my thoughts ever so often, ever so frequently more times that you could ever imagine during the day. At times during the most unexpected moments--I love it, and I love you.

"That deepest thing, that recognition, that knowledge, that sense of kinship began the first time I saw you, and it is the same now, Only now it is a thousand times deeper and more tender . I shall love you to eternity. I loved you long before we had met. I knew that when I first saw you. It was destiny. We are together like this and nothing can shake us apart" Gibran`s word quoted from Mary Haskell`s journal 12th March/1922"

For me it was the first time I read your words. See--there are others that feel like us--kindred spirits of love.  One spirit, two wings. Forever Arany Csillagom, thus it was, thus it is and thus it shall be.

Your Suzie

Promises

 


My beloved Cicukam. How art thou sweetheart? How is the preparation for the party? The Germans can party for sure, but only Magyars can make real, passionate love. I shall fly to you on the wings of thought and be with you all night. Lie in your arms, kiss you and seduce you--melt your heart into a puddle.  Whisper oh so beautiful words of love to you. Make passionate love under the pale Colorado moon, with body soul and spirit.

Take wows, swear oaths, make promises of eternal love. Will you have me. Will you love me always? Eternally? I will. I wonder if you have the ring?

You are the special light of my life. Cherished, protected and loved by my heart forever.
Your  Suzie

Angel

Hey sweet angel yonder. Come share my life, my all with me. Whatever would I do without you? I cannot dare imagine for  I probably would die. You are always the first thing to enter my mind in the morning and the last to leave my  heart in the evening-, though I have to confess that you even occupy my dreams. And what beautiful magical dreams of love, light and passion.

You are in my heart, in my soul and every breath that I take. I know that this is the way it has to be, and must be. You are the reason of my life, of my being of why I am here.  Forever.

SuzieQ

Quills

Good morning my darling . This is the second letter, as God has a huge sense of humor. But thou shalt anger not, neither will we fret about the fonts. This is a minor detail in the scheme of things said the Lord/ Our Lady thy God. It is not the fonts that matter but the soul whence from springs the very thoughts of you. Those wondrous, magical ideas, memories perhaps of long ago. Remember darling van Gogh painted on a tablecloth in a restaurant for his dinner, and now the piece is just as valuable. So "bic" or "quill" matters not, however I really woudn`t mind living in those "quill times" with you of course. But remember always that your writing is exquisite whether you write it with ink or mud, or simply your fingers or as messages in the sand.  It is magnificent, brilliant , I adore and savour every word.

Ah, what sweet thought come to me. You and I on a beach. Gently swaying palms, white foam, and millions of diamond star sparking in the sky. You`re reading you letters to me by the light of  silver moonlight, kiss me gently now and then , between paragraphs. Ah--we are so happy, one. Ok--Suzie, back to real life.

This morning, as you see, you have a present, "Chariots of Fire". It always reminds me of you, so now it is dedicated to you in gratitude for the "Seichem symbols". Why well all that fire, that passion that is within you needs a constant reminder. I hope and wish that whenever you hear it you will be reminded of your dreams, goals, purpose and mission, my love. I hope that it will spurn you to reach greater heights. And I pray that you will remember me--selfish am I? Actually intoxicated by your love and delirious with joy.

I hope this peace of music shall weave its magic within you and evermore work its wizardry on you, joined with "reiki" energy. And those heights that you so long for will be reached. What heights you may well ask? "Just use, demonstrate your gifts to its optimal potential in my name,  for then you shall be capable of great things", thus says Our Lady, not I.

So baby, put fretting , aside, be happy. Worry not, anger not, just love me and allow me to love you.
Evermore breathing kisses of fire, as many as there are stars in those tropical skies. You are so very loved.

Red Dragon

Willow

Hello my beloved Cicuka. I went to the little duck pond yesterday, was ever so beautiful. Ducks, geese, heron, dragonflies and weeping willows.  Your tree the willow. My thought flew to you on gossamer wings.  Are you thinking of me? What joy, what bliss thoughts of you bring my heart. Missing you every second of my life--what sweet sorrow.

Angel hugs and kisses, 
SuzieQ

Wild

You win! My angel. Okay, okay I shall tone down my wild, wild passion filled heart, my romantic spirit, my unbridled soul to the bare minimum. The lovy, dovy stuff. I shall be cool, calm and collected and ever so serious. Well I hope I can or bring out that broomstick or the whip!.

But the morning cards shall continue, as they must. They have their wings and very own spirit--well if it makes you happy. Thus I shall oblige out of love for you and my selfish self. It is a labour of love for me, well no labour at all. However maybe I shall be less verbal and more thought provoking. How about that? You have great imagination, now will be the time to put it to good use.

I suppose less is always more. Espavo sweet prince, I am ever here for you. I shall send something to you in the near future--something to keep you warm on cold nights, and keep you cool on warn nights. No alas  darling, it is not me--neither is it a pullover. But it will sure make you smile. I hope all is well at home.

"Love is always bestowed as a gift 

— freely, willingly, and without expectation … We don’t love to be loved; 

we love to love." 

- Leo Buscaglia

ever yours,
Suzie

Imagine

Hello darling Cicu. The world is charged with the awesomeness of God, isn`t it? Interesting. Once someone told me, " ask a question only if you really want to know the answer". Was that you yesterday? You see baby, I never argue with God, I always trust the Blessed Mother deeply and leave it all in Her hands. Our Creator knows about creation in detail. 

I am taking Oliver and Manj to the airport, they are going to Peru. Imagine you me and Machu Pichu making wild love amongst the ruins. Would you like that?  To feel me being so near, so close. To hear each others every heart beat, feel the passion of every breath. The showers of warm kisses on your face as we  hold each other in tight embrace with nothing between us. No time, no space no distance.  I so wish we were going. 

" because two bodies, naked and entwined,
leap over time, they are invulnerable,
nothing can touch them, they return to the source.
There is no you, no I, no tomorrow,
no yesterday, no names, the truth of two
in a single body, a single soul,
oh total being..." 

-Octavio Paz

 I just so love you my arany bogaram. I wonder if you do today, I know you did yesterday. Hope so. I thank God for us every moment, every second, every heartbeat.

Your Suzie

Echoes

 

Namaste my other self, my very heart! May tonight be filled with the sound of echoes of healing drums, waters, moonlight, dancing and love. Let the memories that you make follow you all the days of your life. Being together is such a blessing no matter what, especially later as we shall look back.

I have no idea what shall happen within our lives, but I do know that I shall always be with you, perhaps in spirit only. I shall be forever encircling you with a protection of light and love. I maybe a cold blooded Draconian, but I do posses a very warm heart. May you be always filled with the song of the echo of love.

Must it be? Yes, it must eternally. Kiss, kiss my angel, 
Your Red Dragon

Wisteria

My darling Indigo Dragon. Celebrate our love every moment my sweetheart, Wizard of my Heart. Aren`t the wisteria gorgeous? But I do remember them being purple--yes. Purple. I was thrilled to hear you so hapy yesterday. Perhaps today will be even more joyous. 

Yes--I did think of you at midnight, but you know I always do. You fill my days and night with love. This fills my heart with total happiness. It is raining here. Remember those kisses? I simply adore you.

"Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies." 

- Aristotle

SuzieQ

 

Flow

Whisperings of love. Good morning to you my sweet Running Deer, my darling one. I did miss you, but that is okay. My heart is always beating for you, and I am with you. When you do kindly things to yourself then you know what it is to be  able to love yourself and an other with a loving heart.

Life is forever changing into more perfection, it all eventually falls into place if we allow it.  All flows from within like a trickling stream. Through love it becomes a river, but we have to have the eyes and the vision to see the miracle, the mystery. Always give your life over to God. Place yourself into the Divine hands of Our Blessed Lady.

Have a day filled with kindness and love. Love you my angel, sending kisses to you.
Suzie 

Light

My darling Indigo Dragon, to inscrutable you. Whatever do you do to me? And how do you do it? By what magick. You are no dragon at all but a wizard, we all know that. I have to confess that you lead or perhaps chase me through a gamut of emotions. I don`t think there is one yet that I have not experienced since being with you.

You make me cry, smile laugh. There are times when I wish I were dead, at other times I am filled with inexplicable joy and happiness that is beyond all reason. Guess this is my fate, loving you to distraction and beyond. The darkness is around me. You are my shield and light. Your name is my only light and ever shall be so.



Your very heart, Q

 

Beyond

Espavo darling sweetheart. I am grateful mostly that I have you in my life. You are such an important part, I can scarcely remember you not being in it. I cannot imagine life without you. How did I manage before?  How would I ever manage after you? Thank you for being you and so loving me. Non of us is perfect, we have our quirks and quarks, but love makes all the difference. If we have that, then we have no obstacles that we cannot overcome, no hurdles high enough that we cannot surpass. 

I pray and hope that we shall be an exception in this life, and that our love will go on--as it always has. But above all that our love with time shall grow deeper, and to be those blessed few.

I know it shall. How can it not? With the Blessed Mother on our side all things are possible. Deo gratias.

Ever loving you beyond time and space,
Suzie

 

Loved a woman?

Ah yes- attracted like a planet to its sun.  I am so moved by your words to me. Thank you sweetheart.

My dearest darling, my very heart! What an exquisite night we had, may you day be just as beautiful. Remember "in dreams and in love there are no impossibilities" said Arany Janos, a well known Magyar poet.

However, the question is now, as a song asks: "Have you ever loved a woman?"I do hope so, and that I am her. Now, the question to me is:" have I ever loved a man?"Well no, till now. For `tis you my love. Espavo my love. I adore the meaning of this sacred gift, which was this word of Etu to Amor on his deathbed on the continent of Mu.

Ever loving you, showering you with kisses,
Suzie
 

Warrior

Indigo Knight of light, my love--I know exactly  where you are coming from, I understand. To be average man or to be a warrior is a choice, which is ours. You have chosen to be a warrior. The eternal "internal Jihad"as Rumi put it, has to be a choice.

This is a choice of so few, but it is yours. This is rather hard and awfully painful, but a blessing non the less. My days, nights are so empty without you when you are on these excursions. Yes, perhaps one day we shall journey to these lands together. We shall talk soon. No distance exists for souls who are part of each other. You are ever in the embrace of my love, heart and soul.

 "I almost wish we were butterflies and liv'd but three summer days 

- three such days with you I could fill with more delight than fifty

 common years could ever contain."
 - John Keats

Loving you, 
SuzieQ

Make Love

Sweet , darling Cicukam. My one and only yummi, yummi, yumkins, the apple of my eye. There is very serious problem you are facing. I think you need seriously to be kissed. So, now you have it--over and over and over ad infinitum

Hoping your week is going to your wished schedule, though it is the 13th. But you know my philosophy, "the universe is unfolding as it should" I would have made a great hippy. Mm, come to think of it , we both would have. Make love not war, seems like a great battle cry to me. 

You melted my heart with your words last night. But then, when again do you not?

 "If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, 

the entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand." 
- Anonymous

I love you baby,

 Suzie Q aka Red Dragon

Never alone

 My mom painted the above for my last birthday...well you know how I adore the sea.
 

Good morning sweetheart, my darling Knight! How are you? I have praying for you real hard, I hope you can feel it. I hope peace enters and fills your heart once more. Once more there will be joy and happiness abound. I do know that it is hard when all else is rebelling, conspiring against one, but it can be overcome. Especially with love.

You are never alone, never forget. No matter how bad it gets, just think of me for I am beside you. I so miss you  and love you so very much.  I hope that is a little consolation for you. I wish we could be watching these waves come in, and be just shut away from the world, just be together. That would be so wonderful.

"If you have a wounded heart, touch it as little as you would a wounded eye. 

There are only two remedies for the suffering of the soul. Hope and Patience" 
--Pythagoras

Loving you my angel. Peace and love to you Deo gratias for all and that you are in my life, Csillagom.
Suzie 

Yielding

My darling Cicukam, my very heart. Most strange, but when you write during the night to me, if I am asleep I get awakened when you send your letters. Thus I am most often able to read them immediately. 

I thought that today being Tuesday, I would not write a long letter, as I am hoping we shall be able to speak tomorrow. I feel we haven`t spoken since forever, and all seems so unreal. But I do know that you and I are very real indeed.

There is a message from the Blessed Mother. She says:
" Do not be so hard on yourself. Love is not suffering, punishing yourself, but being flexible, giving  and allowing yourself to be open. Be accepting of grace. Be like water. With time it penetrates, washes away the hardest of rocks. If you hold water tight in your hands it seeps away, If you cup your hand like a vessel, you can capture and hold it.

You were not created to suffer, but to love and live life according to the will of "I AM THAT  I AM" . Then you shall find me, love and find true peace. So, consecration to My Immaculate Heart is joy, happiness, unity and love. That is the way. For this you were created, and only for this. Be a dragon that you are, but a yielding one. God is always with you".

Thus it is today, my darling. I can barely wait to talk to you tomorrow.

\

 "Love exalts our earthly bodies to heaven, 

and makes the very hills to dance with joy!"

--Rumi 

Kisses of fire and a heart filled with love do I send you.
Forever yours, 
Your Red Dragon

Spellbound

Ah yes! My knight with the golden quill. Thank you my love. My heart surly aches for you. What magic thou weaveth with your words of enchantment. I am totally bewitched and spellbound in total wonder, but mostly by love. Thus shalt I be off to bed with sweet , wondrous thoughts of you. The land of Morpheus beckons us, where we shalt meet once more this very night under the watchful eyes of the gods and perhaps experience immortality for but a moment in time.

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, 

while loving someone deeply gives you courage."

 - Lao Tzu

Suzie Q 

The first kiss

You know darling every morning I seriously contemplate the few words that I would like to send to you, say to you. I so do want to make each word special, different yet the same of how I feel  about you. Mostly, I confess it is to burn those words into your heart, the ones that come from the depth of mine. Never to forget --both you and I. Often I do wonder if that is at all possible, who really knows. But I know that if at all anything, or any part of us does continue on, then it is that part of us that is powered by love. 

The word, expressions do not come as easy as for you, even though they are very much within me. I only posses the soul of a poet, but not the talent. You have that. Thus often the writing skills escape me! Often there are no words to express how I feel. I feel and know that at times I stifle you with the sentimental words of love. I know at times it is far too much. I am sorry about that, but I cannot control my wild, untamed heart heart.  However I do hope you forgive me as each word sprouts forth from my heart because of the deep love I have for you. It is sincere, passionate and born of love.

I am rather aware that we are here on this earth but a brief time, and one day there will come the time when one of us shall leave this earthly realm--and we shall be no longer around. All that shall remain is the record of the love that our hearts whispered to us, and only one of us will be reading the words--wishing and hoping to have that one more word in the morning, yet it shall come no more. Only the memories will be present.

Thus this morning I send you the words of this beautiful poem, which on no account could I even imagine writing. Perhaps in some future time, or future place you will revisit it and think I am speaking to you. 

Remember that life is very fragile, ever so fleeting and  fickle, playing with our very souls. Just know that I love you. It is simple, repetitive, but ever true.

XLlll How do I love thee?

 How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of Being and ideal Grace. I love thee to the level of everyday's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for Right; I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise. I love thee with a passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints, --- I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life! --- and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death. 


With endless love forever, 
Suzie   

Prayers

 The prayer

There are no reason or rhyme to these entries, though I have them in order, it is up to Our Lady as how they want to be posted. There are close to two thousand in the collection, so many of them will have to rest within their sacred space. They are happy, sad, witty, joyous, but some dark, soul wrenching, forlorn and mysterious--but never defeated. I have tried to keep to the more uplifting theme ones as we all have dark day as you know sweetheart, many a days you have gone fishing, into the depths of the underworld and despair. As I have.

Through the years I have come to understand and realize that when I did not hear from I was not the reason. This lesson I had to pay dearly, as much my sentiments had much to do with our separation. I was scared, frightened and lung to you like crucifix. So now I do see. Perhaps that was the cord that had to be broken, and re-spun once more to make it even tighter between us.

You are like this tree balanced on the edge of the precipice, hanging on but still trying to reach the sky. The howling winds, rain  and  snow at times batter you, but never ever can uproot you from the heart of God Herself. Your passion, your light your love is beyond measure. Know this--you are eternally appreciated and prayed for.

"Other men said they have seen angels,
But I have seen thee
And thou art enough.".  
 --G. Moore 

Your Suzie

 

 

Hope and love

 

All that we are, whom we are and how we perceive ourselves comes from within our being. Look not elsewhere. Thus you will receive all the strength necessary to be the best you can be. The world can be a very cruel, dark and jealous place, expect nothing from it. We are not measure through the accolades of the world, but by the way our loved ones feel about us. 

Respect, honor, admiration,courage, support--but above all love that we receive from the heart of the ones that we love is what makes or breaks us. That is what really counts!

All one has to do is look around and see how unhappy, lonely and lost most people are. And what are they looking for? Most hearts are seeking love. We want to be loved, appreciated feel special and accepted by the ones who count.

There is much to the statement of the Lord; "What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his own soul ".

The world shall not bind your wounds, pick up and carry you, nor hold you to its heart. Only the ones who love you. And of course our God, who is infinite love, whose love  is that which is manifested through the ones we love, and those who love us. This is the only way that we shall ever be able to experience God`s physical presence. This is why so many say there is no God.

People who love you is where you have to look for support, strength, understanding when you are alone and feel lost. Nothing else matters. That is why the greatest of gifts is to be loved--not even to love. The greatest pain is often when we lose the ones we love. Thus always appreciate, live in the present and value each moment spent in the embrace of love, in the light of love. Recognize when love enters your life.

So be not saddened my darling Olikam! Think of all that you have, not what you do not. Enjoy it, live it, experience it. You have far more than many could ever dare to dream of. 

The greatest of commandments is "love"And thus you are sweetheart--you are truly loved. Be happy my heart--be ever happy. 

" I love you - those three words have my life in them".
  --Alexandra to Nicholas III

 Blowing kisses of fire to you my angel, my all,
Suzie 

Immortal Beloved

 


Love always, from the pen of Ludwig, but the heart of Suzanne.

February 1/ 2008
My angel, my all, my very self--only a few words today and that with your pencil. Why this deep sorrow where necessity speaks? Can our love endure only though sacrifices? Though demanding everything? Can you change that you are not wholly mine, I not wholly thine?

Oh God, look unto the beauties of nature and comfort yourself with that which must be. Love demands everything and that very justly--that it is with me so far as you are concerned, and you with me. If we were wholly united you would feel the pain of it as little as I.

Now a quick change of things internal to things external. We shall surely see each other , moreover, I cannot communicate to you the observations I have made during the last few days  touching my own life. If our hearts were always close together I would make non of the kind. My heart is full of many things to say to you.--Ah!-there are moments when I feel that speech is nothing after all. Cheer up, remain my true, only treasure, my all as I am yours. The Gods must send us the rest that which shall be the best for us.

 Ever Thine
Ever Mine
Ever Yours

-Ludwig

 your ever loving,
Suzie

Of Love

Psyche and Amor

We love, because it is the only true adventure. This is our story, of Oliver and Suzanne--like so many souls that are searching for their other half. We have been blessed for we have  found each other..

GOD--I am truly overwhelmed. I had no idea we had written so many letters, cards, notes on our lives, on love. I am sure there is well over 1,800 maybe far more. When I did your cards I just took a random batch and copied them, and didn`t bother to look--now I don`t know where to start .  But I will-- this is a true a labor of love, twice over. Some days we wrote to each other three times, now that is crazy. How did we do it? How did we have the time? I have no idea.

Now, looking and contemplating this humungous mountain of paper I see that it was far too much. What can I say--we got drowned by love. The temperance movement was right, there has to be control and limit, we went wild, crazy--we went far beyond that. Now we pay for being so greedy. But it was simply wonderful.

We are never the same, forever changing, but the same. I hope better like wine with age. Yes, we are no match within  the life span of the stars, however, our souls out reach , encompass and out live even the oldest of stars. Immortality is eternal! Thus we are eternal.

See this is the reason I so appreciate the present and remind myself continually of this. As with our love as well  as with our relationship, I have saved all; every word, every moment every thought, I am a hoarder of dreams, of omens--as it is precious , but most of all sacred. All  becomes the framework of memories that remain in our hearts which I truly believe we take along onto our next existence. Something that our soul forever remembers.

Now, I do believe the only thing that touch our hearts and souls counts, the rest is flotsam and jetsam. One needs to recognize all that which is important, that which is real  and that which is born from love. That is the great secret!

Now, where to start--I think I have to pray first for guidance to Our Lady--. Thus it begins.

"The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.
Lovers don't finally meet somewhere.
They're in each other all along".

The Illuminated Rumi ―

I love you--my beloved sweet Oliver, my other self.

Suzanne
3 February/2013